So here I am, in front of my laptop again. When am I always NOT on the laptop? Don't answer that haha. I enjoy this, being able to just randomly type down my thoughts and if others read it, and agree with it, then well thats awesome, but if not, or they disagree, well no worries.
Today was a major headache. I went to my son's field trip to the Nature Center, and I really enjoyed being with him and his class. I got put in charge of 3 students, Ryan being one of them. We walked around the park just basically looking for insects, since they were studying insects. The kids had a great time just basically walking around, turning over rocks, you know, in general, being kids.
Ryan wasn't a very happy camper, but I thought it was just because he was so tired from last night. He had cub scouts, and then when I went to drop him off at his dad's house, he just flipped! So I figured that he was just tired out from that.
After the field trip, I went to school, then I went and got my son from school. It was then he dropped a bombshell on me; "Mommy, daddy hurt me last night."
My world fell apart, then righted itself in anger.
I called my attorney who gave me some sound advice, and is now in the process of pursuing different legal means, and so hopefully, things will right itself again, and my son will not be scared again.
Throughout this whole time, I was sending updates over the phone to my groups of friends and I didn't realize I was texting HIM. He never responded, but thats ok. I don't really care anymore. I think its funny, but time does heal wounds. If he ever decides to get in touch with me again, cool. If not, well, I'm not going to cry continuously about it. I still dont know what went wrong, and yes, a part of me wishes that he would just tell me, but I can't allow myself to sit here and moan about that. Seriously, my kids are more important than anything else, just like his kids are very important to him.
All in all, thinking now... I wish him the best of luck with whatever he is looking for. No ill wills, or anything. Maybe just a impassioned plea for him to tell me what had happened between us, but I'm not going to go out of my way to find out.
My oldest boy just walked in the kitchen, begging me to hold him again like when he was a baby. You know something, that sounds like a nice idea. It isnt that often I get to hold my six year old...most of the time, he is all "eww mom" but tonight, when and while he needs me, I'm going to give him what he needs most of all....protection, security, comfort and most of all, love.
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